Comment
Archive for ‘Omegle’
14 items.
So, little ones, here is a tale beyond anything your wildest dreams could have imagined. In the cold, harsh life of suburbia, my dear friend Danielle gave me her tablet PC. But alas, a dragon ate the stylus, as what happens with all good things. In my attempt to recover the stylus, I exploded the dragon with vast amounts of C4 and the stylus was lost in the explosion, sadly. But, this Friday, I will purchase a new one and it will arrive at my doorstep in half of a fortnight! Hopefully! In the meantime, here is a picture of my kitten:
Dear Can,
How come Democrats are wrong about everything?
Love,
A Curious Republican
Dear A Curious Republican,
I love loaded questions! This is hard question to answer because the GOP and the Democratic Party are essentially the same party. Unless you would also admit you’re wrong about everything, it’s hard to say one group of people is consistently wrong. It would have helped if you gave specific examples on what they’re wrong about! For example, “I believe it was wrong for President Obama to stop that interview so he could eat a ham sandwich and test out his new pick-up lines on the catering girls!” or “Democrats were wrong to bail out companies! That just goes against nature’s motto of ‘survival of the fittest!’ “ So in conclusion, Democrats may be ‘wrong about everything’ but at least they’re not dumb enough to still consider (or to have ever considered) Sarah Palin a viable nomination for the presidency.
Love,
Can Dashmar
P.S. Whig party 4 lyfe!
The exchange is:
Stranger: im on a boat
You: i’m drunk!
You: no i’m not, you got me.
Stranger: im smoking pot.
You: (cries openly at the sight of you burning pots that i bought for a good price while sifting through your belonging to smell your scent, to know who you once were)
I am very unimpressed by the challenge results so far! You people can do better than that! E-mail me at challenges at candashmar dot com to compete!
Guy’s such a freaking baby…
“Waah, I’m a fictional character! You can’t punch me!”
Oh yeah?! Freakin’ showed you!
And now I lost some of my readers! :)
You people are crazy! I have 1000 visits! I doubled up in a little over a day! I’ll have something to celebrate this later…
Is it later yet?
YES!
dear can,
sometimes i get angwee when ppl at school make fun of me for being so smart. it makes me so mad and i want to do bad things to them. is this bad?
love,
billy
Dear billy,
Using learning for evil is not only a necessary part of life but it’s also fun! At some point in your education you’ll learn about chemistry. This will be a good time for you. They will rue the day they made fun of you as the blood rolls down the hallway corridors!
Love,
Can Dashmar
P.S. Good luck in school next year and have a great summer!
dear can,
my roommate is kyle. help!
love,
fuckedinflorida
Dear Incredibly Accurately Named Person, fuckedinflorida,
There comes a time in every man’s life when he must live with someone whose emotions to things you enjoy vary from: hate to dislike. In your situation, you live with Kyle and you must find a new roommate or deal with the consequences. If it would cause a legal snafu, you must be prepared for the following: a terrible movie collection, terrible facial hair, a terrible, giant foam sword, dragon scale armor which happens to be terrible, a terrible porn collection which includes a one picture of a girl being raped by tentacles, terrible facial hair, terrible hair in general, terrible shoes, a terrible smell (it’s dry semen), mediocre to decent sex, and an incredible self-loathing you’ll place upon yourself for living with these. You must either slay the beast, move out, or live with him (lol ya ryte). Best of luck!
Love,
Can Dashmar
P.S. Move out.
As always, e-mail me at advice at candashmar dot com for help! Also I’d like to take this opportunity to say Happy Mother’s Day to everyone, even the men! Also, thank you to my dad for having sex with my mom and not being a terrible parent. You’re a solid B! (I love you and please keep feeding me.)
Achievement Unlocked: 500 Visits “Half of them were me!”
(Also, I added a poll so czech dat shit out!)